Temper Tantrums

For the past few months, my two-year-old has mastered the art of the temper tantrum...the terrible two's I've heard them called. My four-year-old didn't ever enter into a tantrum with such passion and complete abandon, so my husband and I were pretty surprised at first...that such a little guy could muster up such anguish and hysterics in such a short period of time. 0-60 in 0.01 seconds. As I was watching him kick and scream on the floor this morning because I took away the yogurt that he was flinging onto the ceiling, I realized that I have been throwing the same tantrums with God. But, I've learned how to mask my feelings, so my tantrums aren't so noticable. I've learned to grit my teeth, roll my eyes and grumble...hopefully in a way that nobody else sees or hears. We don't like tantrums...they're messy and loud. Besides, who wants to spend time with a 35-year-old woman who throws herself onto the floor each time she doesn't get her way?

I've been wrestling with a few things...God is trying to gently guide me through it. I turn away from him, rolling my eyes, gritting my teeth, kicking and screaming. It's not easy when you know the answer is right, but it wasn't the one you were hoping for. I know He's so much more patient with me than I am with my 2-year-old. I think I'm ready to get up off the floor and listen to what He has to say...minus the eye rolls. It's so comforting to know that He is the perfect parent. No matter how many times I end up on the floor kicking and screaming, He waits patiently for me to listen to Him so I can continue to grow into the woman He wants me to be.

Light as a feather

We had baptisms at our church this weekend. I love watching them...I love hearing about other people's journies to and with Christ...I love hearing how He meets each person exactly where they need it most. The one that really touched me was a young boy. He said that his heart used to feel heavy whenever he did something wrong, but now, when he sins and confesses to God, his heart feels light as a feather. Isn't in funny how surrender can actually bring freedom, how giving up power can be so liberating? I want so much to convey this to my friends and family (and anyone else) who don't choose to live for Christ. I want so much for them to feel the freedom and joy of giving up all we "want" to gain everything we NEED. There are times I feel like giving up, but then I hear a young boy tell a church full of people that his heart feels light as a feather because of his relationship with Christ. I know that I need to trust God and take the opportunities given to me instead of being afraid of what my friends might think...or worse, not loving them enough to share the most valuable treasure I have in my life. I want their hearts to feel light as a feather too.